Group sex carries a high risk for most sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
What is group sex?
Group sex is sex with more than one person at the same time. This could be a threesome or a sex party. It can involve multiple people having sex together at the same time, or partner swapping.
People in a relationship may have sex with other couples. This is sometimes known as swinging or a swingers party.
What are the risks to health from group sex?
The more people you have sex with, the greater the risk of catching an STI. With group sex sessions, the chances that someone will forget to practise safer sex are increased. Even practising safer sex, a condom or dental dam could slip or break and allow infectious bacteria or viruses through. Even if you do use protection, viruses like herpes and parasites like trichomonas can be present on the skin in areas not covered by condoms or dental dams. Bacterial infections like gonorrhoea can also be present in the throat.
In a group sex session, it’s possible that one person with an STI could infect the rest of the group. If sessions are anonymous, anyone who does find they have an STI will not be able to contact others in the group to let them know they should get a test.
Find out more about sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
How will it affect my feelings and relationship(s)?
Sex of any kind is linked to powerful emotions. Anyone considering group sex should also consider the risks to their feelings and relationships.
Although the idea of group sex may be exciting for some, the reality can be different. Even if they agree and are willing to take part, partners can become upset at the thought or sight of the person they love having sex with someone else. Afterwards, people can feel guilty, confused, or vulnerable.
Couples who pursue group sex as a means of ‘spicing up’ their sex lives might find that it damages their relationship. No kind of sex can be a substitute for good communication. Meanwhile, it can be very difficult to know ahead of time that everyone involved in group sex will treat each other with respect and that they are taking part of their own free will.
As with any relationship, if something happens that you are not comfortable with, say no and don’t feel pressured into anything you are not happy with.
How can I reduce the risks from group sex?
The risks to physical health from group sex can be reduced if:
- group sizes are kept as small as possible
- everyone agrees to practise safer sex techniques
- everyone gets tested for STIs
- everyone changes condoms each time they change partners
- everyone change condoms between use on different parts of the body (vagina, anus, mouth).
The health risks can be further reduced if everyone leaves a gap of several months between group sex sessions, so that any STIs that have been passed on will have a chance to show up in tests. It’s also a good idea to maintain a way of contacting others involved in group sessions, so that everyone can be alerted should someone find out they may have passed on an STI.
How can I reduce the risks to my relationship and feelings?
- Everyone talks through what will happen beforehand
- Clear ground rules are set about acceptable behaviour
- Partners are clear that both feel it’s okay to do this.
Remember, it might feel a bit embarrassing at first, but sex will always be better if you’ve talked about it, know your mind, and let those involved know what’s a definite no-no for you.